my thoughts on sch..

Since school started last week, it's been pretty hectic for me, especially since i'm taking P1 this yr. i know many teachers in my sch try to avoid taking lower pri cos 1 main reason is that it's the afternoon session and the day seems to last longer and it's tiring taking P1s especially in the 1st month when they're not used to the long hours in sch compared to their kindergarten days and some of them start crying for their mummys. Well, i did have a few on the 1st day n 1 of them cried for the whole of last wk! at certain points i was quite irritated with him but i finally decided that i just had to leave him alone n not shower him with too much attention. honestly, being in the line for only about 6 months, i'm rather clueless about how to handle crying children n wat i should say to them n also how to handle cases where my kids start wetting their pants..sigh...i guess i lack that maternal instinct in me...n i'm also really amused at how often they need to go to the toilet...the 1st day of sch seemed like a really bad 1 for me cos it was the 1st time i took a P1 class, which meant they had no idea abt basic things like lining up in 2 straight lines n how they ought to sit in the hall n that they were supposed to sit down when the DM told them to sit down in the hall...i had this tendency to take it for granted that they knew these things..plus had to collect lots of books from them n they were bored n noisy..it was a really long day for me that day n by the time i got home that night i was so discouraged i was thinking of ways to pay up my bond so i could quit... i'm really glad to have a colleague like emlyn in sch though, really touched that she actually bothered to call me that night to find out how i was n gave me some advice on how to handle the kids in sch...she's our PE HOD n since knowing her last yr i can really see why she's a leader n a good 1 at that too, she's firm yet compassionate n understanding n a good motivator too..wish i could be in her dept n have her as my sup but no such luck yet .. but really, when i do become a cgl in future, i hope to have those leadership qualities she has.

today the kids were better though i still had to shout at them a few times to get their attention but i am starting to spot some that i can train up to help me do things in class, but must still need to observe them for another 1 or 2 more weeks to be sure...

someone ever asked me before if i found it hard to scold the children cos they are cute, n when i see them i can't bear to scold them. To that, my answer is no i don't find it hard to scold them. whether they are cute or not, i will scold them n punish them if they do something wrong, another reason is i dun have favourites in my class, there are some pupils that i ask to help me out more often than others cos they are more mature n can help me out with certain duties like cleaning the board n carrying books but it doesn't mean i like them more than the others, i realise this has been the case since my 2nd practicum n has become even more so since i started having a form class last july. In fact, i realise now that the reason i found it hard to scold my pupils last time during my 1st pract was cos i was so fearful then, n like wat pst kong preached that time, fear paralyzes us!

i believe in my heart that all this will fit into God's plan for my life n will prepare me for the dreams i have in serving God. God, help me to withstand whatever i need to go through during this time n protect me from all the darts that satan throws at me. Amen.